NO DEADLINES!!

. . . or start times - or performance reviews - or assignments - or money - or terminal degrees (cancer or education) - or titles - or salaries - or expectations (except respect, of course) - no exceptions - no publishorperish - no grades - no rejection letters - no peer review - no dates of publications - no publications - no meetings - or jobs - or job interviews - or tax withholding - or tax - or Republicans (except small "r") - no meat

no airport security - no stoplights - no roll bars - no helmets - no gas - no cars - no commute - no fellowship deadlines, esp. - or fellowships, I guess - or jobs - or salaries - or incompletes - or so-called good academic standing - or so-called graduate assistantships - or so-called careers or so-called life or so-called anything -

no apples from california - no zirconium from australia - no boundaries - no nothing - no income disparities - no income - no to no - go to countdown - go to no.

congratulations you're free *

* warning: taking the preceding too literarlly or often can lead to the following uncommon side-effects: homelessness, obscurity, disease, unemployment, bad grades, bad breath, incarceration, late busses, no busses, stupid professors (stupid professors! Trix are for kidz!), disasters, permanent injury, immanent penury, giving what you have to the poor and following hippie-looking prophets, vitamin deficiency, incompletely-assembled nuclear warheads, aporias, race war, continued penury, madness, non-entity, lack of blogs.